Hello world!

I am in a fantastic mood today! For no real reason, I guess, considering I encountered no less than three sobbing people at work today. Perhaps it's because all the people I ran into and was forced to make small talk with today made me feel so tall and skinny and svelte and blond and...tanned! If you know me, you know what a magnificent accomplishment making me feel like that is. Because I'm pretty much none of those things, except maybe I'm kind of close to tall.

Anyway, one of these people was one of the, um, cooler girls in my group in middle school, and I always wanted to be so cool like her. And to this day, she looks the exact same, and I can honestly say thank you powers tat be for not making that particular wish come true. If I became a pretentious, upper-middle-class poli-sci major at Loyola University* I would shoot myself in the head. Except that I would be so spineless I would maybe only think about it and maybe think about hiring someone else to do it.

So: to anyone who stumbles across this, have a fantastic day/evening/whatever! I will be making up errands so that I can go sit in Starbucks and enjoy the secret stares from the hot dude I went to high school with!

*If you are a poli-sci major at Loyola, I probably don't hate you. Just, you know, every kid I hated in high school (because they were, um, pretentious, out-spoken, hippy-dippy teenagers) went on into poli-sci programs at pretentious universities across the nation. I am somewhat content with going to a school that is essentially an out-of-state, private community college to get my general transfer degree and then head off to a pretentious university of my very own to get my pretentious English degree so I can one day hope to have the pretentious title of Editor-In-Chief of something or other.**

**I make no excuses for my hypocrisy. I embrace it. As should you. Your own hypocrisy, I mean, not mine. That would be weird.